So there I was, entertaining the services of a certain voluptuous vixen. This wasn’t something new, as a man of my status is oftentimes found wanting to get away from the monotony of everyday life. Well, about thirty min into our encounter, her head begins spinning around and laser cannons erupt from her arms. Needless to say I was dumbfounded; especially seeing how this was not how I usually spent my nights. As it would so happen, she was apparently a robotic assassin hired to kill me.
Talk about the last time I try picking up a girl from the club.
Needless to say, I was obviously fairly irked at the way my "night" was developing. Grabbing my bedside katana I did away with her and made my way to the door to try and find some answers. Where was my first destination? The local saloon.
What better place to get the lovely combination of both information and grub. Upon entering the saloon, I found myself face to face with approximately twenty men armed with a staggering assortment of weaponry. Now, if I had done my math correctly, I was severely outnumbered; however, I decided to risk it because I needed answers. Slowly making my way to the bar, I nonchalantly sat down at a stool and ordered bourbon on the rocks.
As I patiently waited for my drink to arrive, I felt a tap on my shoulder. Carefully turning around I soon realized I was staring straight into the face of an ugly brute who appeared to have neither bathed nor brushed his teeth for nearly a decade.
"Can I do anything for you, friend?" I choke out
"Yea, you can get out of our bar if you know what is good for you." He snarled in a low grumbling voice. I honestly couldn’t help thinking that I was trapped in possibly one of the largest clichés of all time.
Being a fairly rational individual, I slowly stepped down from my stool, picked up the stool and bashed it across the large man’s meaty head.
"So then, does anyone else have a problem with me being here?" I asked cheerfully.
Apparently they all did. As I am sure you can all imagine, the ensuing brawl was one that all the men and ladies, particularly the ladies, will all remember....unfortunately I can't seem to remember it at the moment, for it would seem that about twenty seconds into the brawl I was rendered unconscious and dragged to the local jail.
I woke up about five hours later to find myself in the aforementioned jail. I have to admit, it had been a fairly bad day. Not only had I not gotten any information on who wanted me dead, but I also had not yet eaten. So, there I was contemplating my escape when a plot device walked through the door.
To Be Continued. . .
D-Boud
